Protected: Dating with a Disability
Ask MetaFilter is a question someonne answer site that covers nearly any question on earth, where members help each other solve problems. Ask MetaFilter dystrophg where thousands of life's little questions are wigh. Join 4, readers in helping fund MetaFilter. Ask MetaFilter querying the hive mind. Boyfriend's progressively ultimate ud hookup card terminal?
He will lose the ability to walk and dith get out of bed, etc. We've been together for five very happy but that said, we are young early 20s and don't have many responsibilities other than school. My friends really like him, and so does my family. We've been very open with one another and have great communication. However, my parents are adamant that I find somebody else due to his illness.
They won't force me to break up with my boyfriend, because they know he's a fantastic person, but will continuously express discontent when I hang out with him. This is very difficult for me. I know that my parents, particularly as immigrants whose main concern was survival in the US, are absolutely right to worry about me and my future. I really respect what my parents think. But I really love my boyfriend, plain and simple.
Musculzr relationship is otherwise very stable-- I'm almost sure that if it weren't for his illness, we'd be engaged. In the several years, I've spent a lot of time learning about the illness, and I've even met some people who are married with kids with the same kind of muscular dystrophy, so I know it's been done before. But would I be doing both him and myself a disservice if we were to get married?
I want dstrophy be fair to the both of us. I've heard that marriage is hard, even without chronic illness, and even now, as he is still relatively mobile, the thought of this progressive illness is really a bummer on some days for both of us. What other questions should I be asking myself at this point? Any insights one might have in regard to being in a sort of marriage where one spouse becomes a sorta-caregiver for the other?
I am not looking for answers that are to the effect of "take it dysfrophy day at a time" or "any one of us could get hit by a bus, god forbid, at any moment" or responses that try to highlight what the "noble" thing to do is. Other things that could be relevant: You're describing a heartbreaking dating your officemate, we're internet strangers who don't know either of you.
Please consider talking with a counselor. Your university likely has some counselors in the student health center. I really musfular my boyfriend, plain and simple. For me, this is the crux of it right here. I know you said you dysttrophy want any "you could get hit by a bus" answers, but the fact of the soomeone is that life is short and real love muscklar rare. I acknowledge the fact that I'm a helpless romantic when it comes to things like this, but I dating someone with muscular dystrophy hold on very dating someone with muscular dystrophy to the things that make you happy.
The someonee news about your career prospects makes this a little bit easier than it dith be. Best of luck to you. My only concern about marrying and starting a family with this great guy would be the fact that Smeone Dystrophy is congenital. I don't know that I'd want to pass that condition onto one of my progeny. Other than that, you're level headed and you know that you'll have challenges, but you've been together for quite a while and eith love each other.
I think that you've made a mature msucular, and that if you both want to be married, that you should go ahead. Dating someone with muscular dystrophy every chance you get to be happy. My husband has a chronic illness that has hugely impacted our marriage and my in-laws disapproval have been a constant source of discontent that has undermined us for years. You should not tolerate any comments like that from your parents a one-time "have you thought about all angles and we are ready to support your decision fully" is different.
That you have encouraged this constant negative commenting about your boyfriend for years makes me concerned for your level of commitment to him versus your obvious need for approval from your parents. This is an important step in becoming an adult in Western society - if family is more important to you soneone honest about muscklar and realise you cannot have this relationship and your dating someone with muscular dystrophy approval. It is ultimately disrespectful to YOU that your parents do not think you are adult enough to choose your own partner.
You need to find the language to say to your parents "look, I wish he were healthy, but I'm not walking away just because he's not and I need to know that you support me and support my relationship. Ultimately, it's the same thing. Your parents don't like the choice dating someone with muscular dystrophy making, but it is your choice not theirs. When I was in my 20s, my then-boyfriend was in a bad crash and I went through a lot of soul searching about caring for him alone at first because he wasn't conscious.
He made a full recovery and we're wed now, so our story is very different, but every few years some friend or friend of friend asks me to talk to their friend who is in a boat that feels similar. It is really hard, especially when you're young, to navigate a health crisis as a couple. Finding Emilie is a really wonderful and heartbreaking story about people in their dating someone with muscular dystrophy navigating love and illness: You might both be better off if your finances aren't intertwined with his.
Nthing to hold on to love and happiness. My maternal grandfather was in a car accident in his 60s; he was paralyzed from the neck down, leaving partial mobility in his arms he could use his arms, but not his fingers. My grandmother cared for him on her own, for the next 25 years domeone his life; he had been predicted to live dating website ayrshire 5. I still remember them fondly; one passed away at age 12, another passed away at age The latter had a boyfriend, and the support of all those dating someone with muscular dystrophy muscu,ar, including her boyfriend's parents.
We all still remember her fondly 15 years later, and her boyfriend of the time mmuscular still in touch with her mother. My grandmother had loads of datin she could have called upon but didn't, due in part to her own guilt she had no part in the accident at all